This particular round of chemo has been pretty intense this week. The muscle aches and joint pains continue to get worse..I keep waiting to wake up and feel "normal" again. I was excited to celebrate the start of the weekend with my favorite hour - cocktail hour..and am horrified that chemo has taken my favorite vice. All week long, I have had a terrible taste in my mouth and food just isn't tasting the same as normal. So when my glass of Merlot was poured for me, I was so sad to realize it just tasted metallic and terrible. We sat down for dinner and the corn-on-the-cob deliciousness from last week turned in to a bunch of bland mushy kernels. Even my favorite tomato/mozzarella salad was full of sadness. I guess the plus side is the frantic teeth-brushing and mouth-wash-rinsing I am doing to try to get back to a state of normal. I know the mantra by now is, "One more to go, one more to go." I have never considered myself a patient person and this is certainly testing my limits.
Even though yesterday was a rough day, I wanted to keep my commitment to take Gavin and Cohen to go the beach on Friday. We had made plans with Grandma Cindy, Aunt Tricia, Uncle Jim, Laney and Kylie and I knew that Gavin and Cohen would so enjoy the unexpected plans. The weather was beautiful and it was my first time to Grand Haven all year. We packed a picnic and sat around and visited while the kids played in the sand. Even though the water was only 64 degrees, we all got in together. I was only able to stay in for a few minutes because the cold really got to my joints, but it was a very fun day.
I am going to try to pull my attitude together tomorrow and hopefully it will be my last day of muscle pain/fatigue. I know that a positive attitude is one way to really combat some of the physical ailments and it may help in me recovering faster. My sissy has been sending me the most motivating cards in the mail on a weekly basis...they make me laugh and smile and keep my spirits up on those crummy days. Thanks, Noogie :)
Tomorrow, Nana Moni is going home for two weeks. I will be sending out my grieving post later in the day :(