I think I have reached a place where I can be positive about my prognosis and excited about my future. I am optimistic and know that once I am done with radiation and I wrap up a few more quick surgeries, this will all be behind me. I truly believe that now. It feels like the fog has been lifted and my optimism has returned!
Part of this is because I am ready to listen to the encouraging words and people around me and take inspiration in things. I want to hear about others' battles and how they overcame. I watched the 20/20 special on Gabrielle Giffords this week - amazing! It touched my heart to see her say there is no anger and her focus is on being, "Strong, strong, strong". If she can do it, then I certainly can do it.
And I have saved every e-mail and every card I have received this year. On tough days, I read back through them and know I am thankful for all of the prayers, thoughts and love. My friends and family have inspired me to really put this disease to rest once and for all. I'm too tough to let it bring me down. And I finally believe that Brian needs me here to be his wife, Gavin and Cohen need me to be their stepmom, Evan needs me as his mama, and my family and friends need me too. But most of all, I am thankful that I have hope - and recognition that I need all of them too.